My lessons in life- Aziz Premji

Respond instead of reacting
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I am very happy to be here with you. It is always wonderful to be withyoung people. The funny thing about life is that you realize the value of something only when it begins to leave you. As my hair turned fromblack, to salt and pepper and finally salt without the pepper, I have begun to realize the importance of youth.

At the same time, I have begun to truly appreciate some of the lessons I have learnt along the way. I hope you will find them useful when youplan your own career and life.

The first thing I have learnt is that we must always begin with ourstrengths. From the earliest years of our schooling, everyone focuses on what is wrong with us. There is an imaginary story of a rabbit. Therabbit was enrolled in a rabbit school. Like all rabbits, it could hopvery well but could not swim. At the end of the year, the rabbit gothigh marks in hopping but failed in swimming. The parents wereconcerned. They said, "Forget about hopping. You are anyway good atit. Concentrate on swimming." They sent the rabbit for tuitions inswimming. And guess what happened? The rabbit forgot how to hop! As for swimming, have you ever seen a rabbit swim? While it is importantfor us to know what we are not good at, we must also cherish what isgood in us. That is because it is only our strengths that can give usthe energy to correct our weaknesses.

The second lesson I have learnt is that a rupee earned is of far morevalue than five found. My friend was sharing me the story of his eightyear-old niece. She would always complain about the breakfast. The cook tried everything possible, but the child remained unhappy.Finally, my friend took the child to a supermarket and brought one ofthose ready-to-cook packets. The child had to cut the packet and pourwater in the dish. After that, it took two minutes in the microwave to be ready. The child found the food to be absolutely delicious? Thedifference was that she has cooked it! In my own life, I have foundthat nothing gives as much satisfaction as earning our rewards. Infact, what is gifted or inherited follows the old rule of come easy, go easy. I guess we only know the value of what we have if we havestruggled to earn it.

The third lesson I have learnt is no one bats a hundred every time.Life has many challenges. You win some and lose some. You must enjoy winning. But do not let it go to the head. The moment it does, you arealready on your way to failure. And if you do encounter failure alongthe way,treat it as an equally natural phenomenon. Don't beat yourself for it or any one else for that matter! Accept it, look at your ownshare in the problem, learn from it and move on. The important thingis, when you lose, do not lose the lesson.

The fourth lesson I have learnt is the importance of humility. Sometimes, when you get so much in life, you really start wonderingwhether you deserve all of it. This brings me to the value ofgratitude. We have so much to be grateful for. Our parents, ourteachers and our seniors have done so much for us that we can never repay them. Many people focus on the shortcomings, because obviouslyno one can be perfect. But it is important to first acknowledge whatwe have received. Nothing in life is permanent but when a relationshipends, rather than becoming bitter, we must learn to savour the memoryof the good things while they lasted.

The fifth lesson I learnt is that we must always strive forexcellence. One way of achieving excellence is by looking at those better than ourselves. Keep learning what they do differently. Emulateit. But excellence cannot be imposed from the outside. We must alsofeel the need from within. It must become an obsession. It mustinvolve not only our mind but also our heart and soul. Excellence is not an act but a habit. I remember the inspiring lines of a poem,which says that your reach must always exceed your grasp. That is heaven on earth. Ultimately, your only competition is yourself.

The sixth lesson I have learnt is never give up in the face of adversity. It comes on you suddenly without warning. One can eithersuccumb to self-pity, wring your hands in despair or decide to dealwith the situation with courage and dignity. Always keep in mind thatit is only the test of fire that makes fine steel. A friend of mine shared this incident with me. His eight-year old daughter wasstruggling away at a jigsaw puzzle. She kept at it for hours but couldnot succeed. Finally, it went beyond her bedtime. My friend told her,"Look, why don't you just give up? I don't think you will complete it tonight. Look at it another day." The daughter looked with a strangelook in her eyes,"But, dad, why should I give up? All the pieces arethere! I have just got to put them together!" If we persevere long enough, we can put any problem into its perspective.

The seventh lesson I have learnt is that while you must be open tochange, do not compromise on your values. Mahatma Gandhiji often saidthat you must open the windows of your mind, but you must not be swept off your feet by the breeze. You must define what your core values areand what you stand for. And these values are not so difficult todefine. Values like honesty, integrity, consideration and humilityhave survived for generations. Values are not in the words used to describe them as much as in the simple acts.

At the end of the day, it is values that define a person more than theachievements. Because it is the means of achievement that decide howlong the achievements will sustain. Do not be tempted by short cuts. The short cut can make you lose your way and end up becoming thelongest way to the destination. And the final lesson I learnt is thatwe must have faith in our own ideas even if everyone tells us that weare wrong. There was once a newspaper vendor who had a rude customer. Everymorning, the Customer would walk by, refuse to return the greeting,grab the paper off the shelf and throw the money at the vendor. Thevendor would pick up the money, smile politely and say, "Thank you, Sir." One day, the vendor's assistant asked him, "Why are you alwaysso polite with him when he is so rude to you? Why don't you throw thenewspaper at him when he comes back tomorrow?" The vendor smiled and replied, "He can't help being rude and I can't help being polite. Whyshould I let his rude behaviour dictate my politeness?

In my youth, I thought of myself as a rebel and was many times, arebel without a cause. Today, I realize that my rebellion was another kind of conformity. We defined our elders to fall in line with ourpeers!

Ultimately, we must learn to respond instead of reacting. When werespond, we evaluate with a calm mind and do whatever is mostappropriate. We are in control of our actions. When we react, we arestill doing what the other person wants us to do. I wish you all thebest in your life and career.

I hope you achieve success in whatever way you define it and what gives you the maximum happiness in life.

"Remember, those who win are those who believe they can."

(Address by Azim Premji, Chairman, Wipro Corporation, in the "Shaping Young Minds Program" (SYMP) organized by the All India ManagementAssociation (AIMA) in collaboration with the Bombay ManagementAssociation (BMA) on February 9, 2004 at NCPA in Mumbai on " My Lessons in Life. )